I realised when I slowly settled down in this country that football was religion. It was an adorable sight to see children as young as 2 or 3, some still in their nappies, dribbling football in the field and embracing the sport as if they were born to play. In most social gatherings, it was the hot topic of discussion, and one of the favourite pastime of men were to gather in the pub, watch football in giant screens over frothing beer. I looked at my chubby little boy, floundering clumsily, he had just learnt to walk, and thought I have to enrol him into this game as soon as I can. I have to make him love this game. I thought it would giving him an edge and ,more importantly, help him bond with other boys. I waited a few years, and once he was five I signed him up for football training. I was more excited than him. I bought him expensive trainers and football shirt and shorts. How he cute he looked. But from day one I could see he was like fish out of water. He would go to training unfailingly with a smile on his face, never protested but it was only because he didn’t want to disappoint us. At first I thought it was too early for me to give up, he was too young to know what his likes and dislikes are. He needed a little push, a nudge. We saw him struggling in the field, but we kept on encouraging him, with time he would get the hang of it, I kept on saying myself. But I was wrong. He would run from one end of the field to the another on his scraggy legs, wait for others to pass him the ball, which never happened, and he would never tackle the opponent to get the ball, it was a sad sight. As time passed we realised, he was just not cut out for football and we were just forcing him to play. Then we tried to turn him into a spectator, we started watching football matches at home, mostly the World Cup, to generate his interest but we could never see the spark in his eyes, the one sports lovers have when watching their favourite game. The thrill, the heady excitement. I was heartbroken. How was he going to make any friends, if he was not interested in sports. But I couldn’t see him go through this torture day after day. I decided to stop his football training , albeit with a heavy heart. I realised if he didn’t enjoy it, there was no use of pursuing it. That was it. We never asked him to play football again. He started school. When most boys played football in recession, he would engage himself in other activities like chasing other kids. He was never dull and listless. He always found something to do. He was very athletic and was often dubbed as the fastest in class. Slowly, my anxiety began to ease, he started to make lot of friends in school. Most of his friends were die hard football lovers, but he was completely at ease with them, and never felt out of place. When he was ten we moved to a different city and he had to join a new school, but very soon he became the most popular boy in his class. Though not sporty, he was a nice boy, never the bullying or bossy type, and what I admired about him was that he didn’t have a jealous bone in his body. He loved to see others grow as much as he enjoyed his own growth. His amiable nature helped him make a lot of friends. He was also funny and his antics make his burst out in gales of laughter.
By the time he started secondary, which was again another school, he was brimming with confidence and was ready for the next phase of his life. In secondary too, he straddled easily and soon had a huge circle of friends. A big school, each year having 5 sections, he had friends from across all sections. I could gauge his popularity from the fact that whenever I invited his friends for sleepover, almost each and everyone would turn up.
And, yes, most of his friends love football. His best friend is an passionate footballer, and is a goal keeper. Till date he doesn’t enjoy football, but he has lots of other interests. He loves drama, and has tremendous stage presence. His teachers say that he is very natural when it comes to taking the stage. He is good musician, he plays the piano, the guitar and the drums and wants to join the entertainment industry.
I know longer worry about him when it comes to making friends. I don’t think he will have any dearth of it . I still curse myself sometimes for pushing him so aggressively to play football, but I was growing as a parent too. My child seems so happy and confident now.
Daily Dose of Shilpi 